Inside-Out...

Today I started thinking more in depth about a lil' something that's been bothering me. While folding clothes I thought to myself about my wardrobe and how I used to be in high school versus how I am today. Nothing too deep, but just a reflection of the outside.

I was such the risk taker in high school dressing how I wanted despite ridicule. I guess some say that's what being a teenager is all about about, but with some, such as me, I disagree. I expressed myself honestly and truthfully. My outside truly reflected my inside despite how good, and unfortunately how bad.

Now, as I age, and yes I say that with a little salt behind my words, I realize that I've lost my external way. I no longer dress to express, I dress for necess-ity. I might as well wear a frickin' uniform. One for work, one for the store, and one for casual ventures out. And my beloved boo-piece doesn't help, because she could not care less.

Oh and to make matters even worse, I suck at forcing it. Just not my thing. Every time I attempt to force it I come off looking too old or too young. Both which are quite sad in my lil' eyes.

So now that it is officially on my mind, maybe some sense of style can creep back into my existence, because boring was never my thing. I guess, because of life and it's many demands it's not hard to loose one's self, externally or internally. Because I look in the mirror and my insides yarn or better yet, squinch to figure out what it's looking at.

(Light bulb moment)

*Eureka*...Maybe this is the first time in a long time that I have actually felt comfortable reflecting what's on the inside. Whoa, okay, I think that's it. I have watered myself down to be around a range of people, hence what appears on the outside is watered down.

I tell you, simple things are seldom simple.

I am me and that's who I want to present myself as.